Jenaka Padang Pasir

       Suatu hari seorang a'rabi sembahyang dibelakang seorang imam. Sedang imam tu baca al-Quran; tiba2 dia terlupa bacaan dan terus membaca ta'awwuz(mnta perlindungan dr syaitan) berulang kali. Maka a'rabi berkata "Syaitan sebenarnya tak bersalah pun. Kau je yg tak pandai baca Quran"

      Suatu hari seorang a'rabi menyelam di lautan pd musim panas beberapa kali. setiap kali dia menyelam dia akan menghitungnya dgn dia mengikat helaian tali. Maka ada org bertanya tentang perbuatannya. Dia menjawab "Ini adalah mandi2 junub yg yg aku qadakan dr hadas2 besar yg aku tak mandi lagi pd musim sejuk."

       Suatu pagi seorang a'rabi solat subuh di belakang seorang Imam. Imam itu membaca surah Al-Baqarah(lembu betina) sehingga a'rabi tadi terlepas agenda yg nak dilakukan selepas solat. Pd hari berikutnya sblum Imam solat subuh; a'rabi tadi bertanya "Pagi ni kau nak baca suruh ape?" Imam menjawab "Surah al-Fil(gajah)" Lantas a'rabi tadi keluar lari dr masjid. Dia berkata "Semalam surah al-Baqarah (lembu betina) pun dah sampai tengah hari; ni nak baca surah al-Fil(gajah) mesti sampai tengah malam."

a`rabi = org arab yang duduk di padang pasir ( di luar kawasan kg atau pekan).

p/s : tuntutlah ilmu sampai ke negara china.

Sendal Gusi

Convict

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.  He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife: "Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you." To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

Married Men Only

In a small town in the US, there is a rather sizable factory that hires only married men.  Concerned about this, a local woman called on the manager and asked him, "Why is it you limit your employees to married men? Is it because you think women are weak, dumb, cantankerous..or what?" "Not at all, Ma'am," the manager replied. "It is because our employees are used to obeying orders, are accustomed to being shoved around, know how to keep their mouths shut and don't pout when I yell at them."

p/s:  ilang jap tension aku..haha....